The Value of Pivoting

Unlike my older brother, I have never been a good basketball player. To my great chagrin when I was a kid, unlike the other things I applied myself to and managed to see marked improvement (e.g. trigonometry), I never managed to become a true baller. Yes, I was that kid often picked last - like dead-ass last to the point that the remaining team left to pick would start looking around to see if someone else in the park/near the court/on the block might want to play before they would be forced to pick me. Although that experience sucked at the time, I can laugh about it and own it, unlike some dudes who try to creatively re-write their "glory basketball days". And despite my lack of game then and now, I have always enjoyed the sport of basketball (mostly watching nowadays), as it has taught me a lot of skills that are applicable to my everyday life. One such skill is pivoting. For those unfamiliar with pivoting in basketball, it entails keeping one foot in place while holding a basketball and moving one's other foot one step in any direction. The immense value of this one move is that it allows a player the ability to move an innumerable number of different directions with ease without having to dribble the ball - and thus be forced to move beyond this one spot. At it's essence, pivoting provides a player options, as long they all fit within the framework of the shot clock. Although I rarely play basketball these days, I often use this singular move in my life, especially when it comes to dealing with people and situations that have the potential to send me off the anger management cliff.

Learning to pivot when I am Sam Jackson-level angry - think Pulp Fiction - has helped me to grow immeasurably in my personal and professional life. Much like you, I have found myself truly pushed to my limits by certain people and situations, whether by happenstance or by my provocation. Unfortunately, in the past I haven't always been...uhh "graceful"...in dealing with my anger and frustration. I am not going to go into chapter and verse as to what I've done - that in some cases is a matter of public record (I have never been to jail, though) - as what I've learned from my anger management failures is to pivot away (mentally, emotionally, physically) when faced with a CODE 10 situation (i.e. I am about to lose my shit.). Specifically, pivoting for me entails shutting down dwelling unnecessarily on someone or something that upsets me (e.g. "I can't believe this mother...... did this to me..."), not stoking the fire of emotions that are destructive (e.g. "I'm gonna get you, you just wait..."), and walking away from situations that have the potential to go there (i.e. the police will be making a guest-star appearance). Whether it be work related, such as dealing with nonsense that far exceeds my job description, or dealing with friends and/or family who test my patience (they know just the right buttons to push), pivoting has been a godsend. Besides providing me an out, it has given me the invaluable time to pause and reflect on my words and actions before I act, which is clearly important when one if firmly entrenched in adulthood. One part and parcel of getting older is realizing and caring that some things said in the heat of anger are very hard, if not impossible, to walk back. Furthermore, being profoundly embarrassed and contrite about showing your ass (i.e. losing your cool and acting a fool) IN ADDITION to being unable to rectify your ugly behavior is truly a jagged pill to swallow. I know, as I have had to swallow a lot of them.